Summertime, Summertime, Sum, Sum, Summertime

We unflinchingly say that we’re full time performers. It’s a badge of pride. Sure we haven’t had our New York Times article yet, or a TV show offer, but damn it, we work hard. Sure we don’t work much during the summer, but during the “school year,” the four of us do the work of eight men! Well, eight tiny men. Each one about half our size. You do the math.

The reason we don’t work as much during summer is because most of our shows are at colleges, and most colleges close during the summer, probably because they couldn’t keep afloat distributing all those free condoms during the lusty, warmer months.

So during the summer, we each find bizarre and non-committal ways of paying the bills while still leaving ourselves open for the usual business items and smattering of shows. Zach’s been living in Northampton, working on his hip-hop career as Mr. Napkins and directing theater at an arts camp. As usual, Andrew is changing the world in new and exciting ways, most notably through the Harry Potter Alliance, a social justice organization dedicated to fighting the dark arts in the “muggle” world. And Seth has been picking his nose.

I’ve pieced together an elaborate patchwork of occupations that fulfill my employment goals of being more interesting than they are lucrative. These include teaching Shakespeare in Vermont, house-sitting, organic urban gardening, and teaching a few martial arts classes at a camp in Cambridge. Teaching children how to kick and punch “bad people but not each other” provides me with a wealth of strange or "darndest" things kid say.

Yesterday, I was teaching some kids a stretch known as the Plow Pose in yoga. In it, you lie on the floor, then bring your legs up over your head with your feet touching the floor behind you. You end up doubled over with your back on the floor, your knees on your forehead, and your feet extended past your head. One little boy was struggling to stretch further and further, grunting and talking to himself by way of encouragement. Pleased that one of my students was showing such initiative, I walked over and finally heard what he was saying.

“I can… almost… (grunt!)… taste… my balls!“

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Aaron Kagan tours FULL TIME with the Late Night Players.